Correction. Worst ex-boyfriend ever: CHRIS from the role of “IS DUMB.”
Maegan
what a dick. what a Nazi asshole.
Chelsea
I mean she was annoying and had ass-burgers or something
Andrea
Chelsea, you can’t be an Angry Virgin if you don’t like penises on your body.
Maegan
the towel on the right is for my hands and the towel on the left is for my butt.
Rachael
This giant freaking dead deer took up the ENTIRE LANE and I had no choice but to run over it. I like continued to heave for the next ten minutes down the interstate I crushed that deer so much.
EJ
I’m so deleting this bitch, she divorced my cousin.
Chelsea
I can’t sleep. I keep thinking about Chris’s creepy chest thing.
Chelsea
Its like a monsoon out there.
Chelsea
This is a ticket into hell!
Chelsea
I gotta pee and then im goin to Intro to Naptime.
Maegan
2011 was a SLUT. YEAR. FOR. ME.
Chelsea
Look at all these fucking goldfish omg thay match my hair
Andrea
Come back i have to poop & i cant leave chris in here alone
Rachael
dr. pepper is like a hooker. a hooker that says hey let me hop in—free of charge! and im like oh wow cool this is great and shes like yeah i know. look at my tits. look at how big they are and how much thatll help you in your future endeavors. and im like you’re right thats great. and then when we get to my appt she starts to get all slutty. im about to stick something in her im not sure what — and theres NO VAGINA. SUDDENLY, THE AWESOME HUGE TITS SUDDENLY DISAPPEAR. before my very eyes everything about her is disappearing. and im left with a bitter, broken heart. never to trust again.
Rachael
just some funny shit
from a few friends
who call themselves
CREAM